After talking all about the fact that I was quitting my job and changing my career, I received lots of positive comments and well wishes. I also received both messages and comments from people wishing that they could do the same. So I thought I should help you realise, that you can totally do what I’m doing. This advice applies to all aspects of your life, not just your career. So I’m going to share what helped change my mindset, the various influences as well as the changes I have made to my mentality. Let’s get stuck in.
First I should give you a bit of a brief about me. I was a mostly positive person with a pretty big negative streak. I would be jealous of other people’s success – Why are they getting all the success, I work just as hard… or I liked to blame X, Y and Z for my current situation. If only I’d had those opportunities or They took that opportunity, which meant I didn’t get it. I also enjoyed a good gossip – turns out this is not healthy for you or the people around you. It’s a negative spiral that will reflect back on you every time. Although I did a lot, I was still lazy and made excuses not to do more.
So about a year ago I decided something was amiss. I was mostly happy but not quite. I had just started listening to audiobooks around this time, so I took advantage. I started listening to The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. It rang true for me. There were aspects of her life that she improved by making small sustainable changes. She also took ownership of her life choices and her negativity. It felt as if it was written for me. So I started to make similar small but continuous changes that have massively impacted me. After working through some other self-help style books and not liking them, I went back to a classic, The Success Principles by Jack Canfield and Janet Switzer. Now there is a fair amount of cheese and it can definitely be a bit longwinded. If you can ignore that, this is another powerful book. It gives you the responsibility and possibility to make a success of your life. Again, another impactful moment. The third book is the most recent addition to my collection, The Magic of Thinking Big by David Schwartz. By now I was already starting to become aware of the blame game I was playing and that I wasn’t really making the most of my situation. This book has driven some powerful points home. It highlights that you have no reason what so ever to make an excuse. This has been such an important turning point for me. I could always find a reason. Not any more.
These books are great to gradually chip away at any negative mindset you might have. They will highlight the changes you can make and the difference they will make to your life. I’ve always been more prone to believe anecdotal evidence over any kind of stats. If someone has lived through the situation and come out the other side, I will trust them and I will figure out how to make it work for me. Stats can get boring and I can find them hard to translate into my daily life. However, if you are a fan of these, go forth and find what works for you!
Next up, inspiration
I’m sure most of you know of Casey Neistat in some way, shape or form. He is almost the same age as me and he has done great things with his life. Now he hasn’t cured some sort of disease or anything like that. He has however overcome some serious barriers in his life. He dropped out of high school to earn a living to support his newborn. He worked every shitty job going, just so he could have the money to still work towards his goals of being a film-maker. He has learnt and grown and continued moving forward, even when others tried to hold him back. He has never taken NO as the final answer. I have met many inspiring people in my life, he has been the most relatable for me. The man works so hard, non-stop to reach his goals. This is inspiring. I got to ask him a question at the Power of Video conference, basically, how do you accomplish something and do something that you think will be brilliant, but you’re too scared. His answer? You keep yourself so busy that you don’t have time to focus on the negative What If side. You just go and do it. Who inspires you? Find them, ask them a question if you can, or just translate their actions to your life.
The next important bit? People
Surround yourself with good, positive, busy people. You want people that will support your goals, that will tell you that you can do it. That will help you figure shit out and work with you to do it. They will help keep you inspired and moving forward. If you are spending your time with negative people that would rather point out the flaws in your plan instead of helping to figure out how to make it work, you’re more likely to take the negative approach…. You’re right, I couldn’t do that…that sort of success is for the lucky few.. LIES. The success is there for you, you just have to get up off your ass and get it. Positive people that are driving forward towards their goals are always willing to share that with people. Negative, small minded people are often jealous and it is their joy and delight in tearing other people down. They may not be outright nasty people, just negative. Reduce the time you spend with these people. Find people that are doing great things and hang out with them! There are plenty of social groups out there, google is your friend!
This is the most important. With all of this YOU still have to change your attitude. YOU have to stop blaming others and take responsibility for your life. YOU have to decide what is important to you and go chase it. YOU have to stop making excuses…but I don’t have enough time…YES YOU DO. If you are always making that excuse when it comes to hitting a goal, maybe it’s the wrong goal for you. Maybe you need to really assess what it is you want from your life. You have only one spin around, make the most of it! Stop wasting time. You have to make the conscious decision to shift your attitude and you have to decide every single day. At least until you have changed you attitude and then it’s just habit.
I like to repeat a little saying to myself… You either make excuses, or you make progress. Now we all have low days and lazy days, but you should also have progress days. You should have mostly positive days. Now that is a very sweeping statement and I know there are people out there that suffer with depression and anxiety. I have had some experience with this in my life and I am forever grateful that I am in the best mental health I have been in for years. I have moved forward, I have gotten the help I needed when I needed it. I am forever thankful that I had good people in my life to point me in the right direction. For those that don’t have any mental health issues…. GET UP OF YOUR ASS AND DO SOMETHING. Stop making excuses. Do Epic Shit.